Today sucked!

The waiting game is over! at least for this month! All month long I could have sworn i was prego! and i started my period... well... maybe maybe not. i might have miscarried, either way! it sucked i cryed and ate chocolate, i cryed some more, i slept, and i drank a ton of water! and then for a distractions i went to the in-laws to watch the super bowl, bleed, and sleep! i have been have a very heavy flow, with no sign of stopping, but then again this is only the first day! i'm just sad and wanting a baby and crying and wanting a baby! so all i can do i guess is go to the doctor, get my yearly check up and and keep trying... just keep trying, and try not to get invested until i know know that everything will be good, and that i will get my baby! ... and i know that it's not going to be easy on andy either! i know he is being brave and holding me and making me feel better, but i'm sure he is hurting. i need to be more compassionate toward his feelings, because i'm more than aware of my own! ohhhh just breath!